Achievement Unlocked: Not Being Such a Bitch!

Every year around my birthday , for as long as I can remember, I have had a deeply introspective period (breakdown) where I question (flog myself emotionally) every facet of my life. “What have you done with your life!?” is the question I seem to ask myself most. It is only the past 2 years that I have had any substantial answers. I have been told that I don’t give myself enough credit for achievements. But if you ever played games on an Xbox 360 achievements, even turning on the console awards you like a kid who just showed up to the track meet. I hate the PC bullshit that they give you “participation” awards for just being there. It’s crap. And I don’t think it send the right message to kids. “You can do nothing and still be awarded for it”. I may not have always done my best, but I would rather be rewarded when I get to the top of a mountain rather than wasting the fanfare with me just standing on a pile of dog shit. If that makes sense. Don’t get me wrong. I celebrate my small achievements to a certain degree, because it helps me keep moving forward and taking on the bigger obstacles. But I don’t want or expect people to hand me a trophy every time I change the cat box or vacuum the house. It would seem a bit much.

You get what you give. Karma. Don’t be a dick. Golden rule. Do unto others…blah de blah. With that in mind I don’t feel like I have lived up to my potential in life. I have been incredibly lucky and was handed a life I really don’t feel I have earned. A wonderful, kind and sexy husband, and two of the most beautiful kids in the history of ever, not to mention the slew of awesome friends and family who love us and cheer us on daily. How is my attempt at being humble working for you? Too much? Okay so maybe I am overly prideful in my life. But it doesn’t make me any less thankful. In the grand scheme of things I am given one life, a drop of water in a ocean of time. And it is only recently that I have wanted it to mean something to someone other than myself. Not that raising two awesome kids isn’t enough, but I want to be able to leave a legacy for them they can be proud of. I have seen a bunch of blogs and stories about random acts of kindness. One in particular was a woman who was turning 35 and decided for her birthday she would do 35 acts of kindness. I hate my birthday, always have. So since this being the last year of my 20’s..I wanted to go out with a bang…an unselfish bang even. So I have tasked myself with doing 29 random acts of kindness by my birthday, April 16th. And so far I have maintained my goal of act least 1 act of kindness a day.

I honestly didn’t expect to feel this good about doing just small kindnesses. I guess I try to put out a rather cynical barrier around myself. But when I think of the state of the world with the constant overly saturated with negativity and snark, I just feel tired of feeding the beast and being bitter and jaded, and I want to feel hopeful for humanity. Even the smallest contributions might inspire someone else to do some good. I don’t think we realize the power we have to touch people’s lives. I have 66 Facebook friends. And most of them have anywhere from 1-1000 friends. We are connected to millions of other people and we seem to forget the impact our attitudes and actions can have. The phrase you catch more flies with sugar than vinegar comes to mind. So I hope in my achievement of 29 random acts of kindness that hopefully a few beneficiaries of my actions will pay it forward and do their own kindness count. I will try and keep you all posted. But I don’t want to write out a list of what I have done…it seems a bit braggy and egotistical. Instead I think I will just celebrate a little each day..maybe eat a cookie, or pat myself on the back.

“Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.”
— Scott Adams


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